Chris: A peaceful morning in Muskoka. A simple scene of peace and tranquility. Nature at its finest. The birds are chirping, the loon is calling, and the bears are currently tranquilized. This is truly the majestic beauty of Canada. (fart sound) PSYCH! We're still at crummy old WAWANAKWA! Welcome back to TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND! It's been a LONG grueling and torturous eight weeks. Well, you probably got REAL tired of this show by the halfway point, if you're still reading/watching this, then congratulations. You have a high tolerance level. The fact that you're still putting up with us is FANTASTIC! Just hang in there for a little while longer, it will all be over soon. We're at the finale! And BOY do our two campers look TOUGH, CRUEL, AND MEAN! (Dj walks out of the confessional, still wearing heels. Dj stares at Chris…then the camera..then awkwardly walks away) Okay. Not so much. But hey! It's the best we got! Countless teens have fallen along the way to victory. But these remaining two were not discouraged. They fought the hardships and struggled the whole way through. They survived the challenges, the food, and my cynical, cheesy, facetious, yet irritatingly obnoxious smile. (smiles. Teeth sparkle) Who will win? Dj, who is a crybaby on the inside, but a brickhouse on the outside. Or Zoey, a cute face on the outside, but a berserker on the inside. You can only find the answer right here RIGHT NOW on our last episode of TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND!
=== Campgrounds === (Dj and Zoey are in their own cabins by themselves. Chris blares at them over the loudspeaker)
Chris on Loudspeaker: ROLL CALL! DJ! DO SOME THING FUNNY!
Dj: (was awoken by the loudspeaker. Dj bursts out of his bunk in his sleepwear) WHAT? huh!? Who!? WHERE!? (trips off the porch and lands on his face)
Chris on Loudspeaker: …NOT BAD. ZOEY!?
Zoey: (pokes her head out the window and gives the loudspeaker the finger)
Chris on Loudspeaker: FAIR ENOUGH! JUST LETTING YOU TWO KNOW THAT TODAY IS THE DAY WE DETERMINE A MILLIONAIRE. NO BRUSH YOUR TEETH, BRUSH YOUR FEET, AND BRUSH UP ON YOUR GAMEPLAY. IT'S GONNA BE A LONG DAY! SO MAKE SURE TO PACK YOUR BAGS. AS SOON AS TODAY'S FINAL CHALLENGE IS OVER, YOU WON'T HAVE TO SLEEP IN YOUR CABIN AGAIN.
=== Outside Girl's Bunk === (Dj walks over to Zoey's bunk with his luggage and knocks on her door)
Dj: Morning Zoey! Wanna head over to the dining hall for some breakfast? We want to be up and ready befo(Zoey walks out of her bunk dressed as Commando Zoey again) OH SWEET MERCIFUL BLARG! NOT AGAIN! (throws his luggage in the air and leaps off the porch and hides)
Zoey: Relax Dj. I just want to look the part for the finale.
Dj: So….you're not crazy?
Zoey: Oh trust me. As soon as the finale starts, I will be. (sweetly smiles)
---> Dj: Zoey is the most switcheroo person I know! I swear, it's like she has Multiple personality disorder! (pause) Could you imagine?
---> Zoey: (ties a headband on her head) Sorry Dj. But now that I'm here, I'm going all out. Prepare to be trampled!….if that's okay with everyone?
Chris: (approaches the final 2) So, it's time.
Zoey: (cracks her knuckles) Bring it.
Dj: Hold it.
Chris: SAVE IT! We're on a time schedule. Now go give your feelings in the confessional.
---> Dj: Out of 45, I am stoked to be here! Making it to the finals is the coolest thing I've done since I…..I….Man, I haven't done anything cool in a while. (shudders)
---> Zoey: Personally, I am happy to be here, but at this point, I'm tired of this game. I just want it to end already. I mean, I love this game, but….it hasn't exactly been….too nice.
---> Dj: The food here was awful. But at times, my cooking would make up for that. I'm still bothered that Chef couldn't make acceptable food with a perfectly fine kitchen! (sighs) Everything about that kitchen was some oven loving.
---> Zoey: The food. Awful. The chef. Awful. The catering was atrocious! I'm getting my stomach pumped free of anything I may have eaten here as soon as I get home.
---> Dj: The people were sweet! I miss so many of them. I miss Cody, and Will, and Abigail, and even people like Courtney. I can't wait to see Katie again. It's been ages since we've talked..or sat together. Or had food together. Or walked together. Or (cuts off)
---> Chef: The people SUCK!
---> Zoey: The people….meh…could have been worse. I mean, there was a fair handful of jocks and jerks. But there were always those diamonds in the rough. My best friends. (remembers Will, Abigail, Cody, Leshawna, Gwen, Dawn, and Mike)
---> Chef: MY best friends? I HAVE no friends!
---> Dj: What will people remember me for? (montage flashback of Dj's various points of fainting, crying, and sucking his thumb) …..My heartfelt bravery for my friends. (smiles)
---> Zoey: What will I be remembered for? (montage flashback of Zoey's anger and her destructive attitude and Commando Zoey)….My serene and peaceful personality. (smiles)
---> Chef: What will I be remembered for? (montage of Chef cooking horrible abominations) I'll tell you EXACTLY what you'll remember about me! THAT I'M SWEET, KIND, AND DONATE TO PUPPY ORPHANAGES.
=== Dock Of Shame === (Zoey and Dj stand face to face, staring angrily at each other)
Chris: Look at our fierce warriors!
Zoey: (growls at Dj)
Dj: (growls at Zoey)
Zoey: (glares at Dj and knashes her teeth at him)
Dj: (glares at Zoey and knashes his teeth at her)
Zoey: (screams at Dj as a battle cry)
Dj: (screams too until he starts coughing) Oh! OUCH! ugh…I think a fly flew in my throat. (coughs for a whole minute) Okay…Okay… I'm good.
Chris: So much for our fierce warriors. This finale is gonna stink. You two better make it interesting.
Dj: By "interesting" you mean life threatening? Right?
Chris: Of course, Dj. You guys have only been here like what? Eight weeks. You should know by now that being safe is not how I roll.
Dj: Mind toning it down a bit?
Zoey: Really, Chris? Please.
Chris: You want me to make the finale safe for you guys? (They nod. pause. Chris begins laughing as hard as he can) You kids ARE TOO MUCH! (stops laughing. Chef appears on a raft in the lake and rows to the dock) Okay. Final 2, take this raft and row it to the bottom of the cliff area from challenge #1.
Zoey: Is this part of the finale? (Dj looks at Chris, confused)
Chris: Yes. Now get to it! (Zoey and Dj both grab oars and row towards the cliff) And there they go. Off to win a million dollars.
=== Lake Wawanakwa, Cliff Base === (Dj and Zoey are standing on a raft and have rowed into the shark zone of the cliff)
Zoey: I don't see any sharks.
Dj: (pokes his head under the water and pulls his head up. He now has no head)
Dj: (his head pokes out from his shirt collar) Naw. The coast is clear. No sharks. (a piranha is biting Dj's ear though. The two look at the water and see ripples splashing against their raft. Then they hear a low rumble) Do you hear that?
Zoey: I don't hear it. I SEE it! Look! (points to the lake. Two yachts are pulling up. One is green with a giant picture of the letter "D" on it. Half of the campers from elimination are cheering onboard. The other yacht is red with a picture of a "Z" painted on it. Half of the campers are cheering onboard)
Dj: Look! It's the others!
Dj's Boat: Sierra, Trent, Charlotte, Robert, Geoff, Abigail, Noah, B, Harold, Owen, Katie, Will, Bridgette, Cody, Lindsay, Heather, Anne Maria, Shin, Sadie, Ezekiel and Tyler
Zoey's Boat: Felicity, Gwen, Duncan, Courtney, Jo, Leshawna, Lightning, Beth, Dakota, Izzy, Ezekiel, Dawn, Mike, Scott, Eva, Sam, Vanessa, Blaineley, Cameron, Alejandro and Justin
Katie: DJ! DJ! Hooray! Hooray! (the others start chanting) You can do it, Dj!
B: (holds up a big poster that says "DJ" in sparkling glitter)
Abigail: Win the million and run with it like you STOLE IT!
Harold: Go! Dj! You got this! Zoey has no chance of winning!
Cameron: Actually. Zoey has a 51.9999884555 percent chance of winning. By calculating simple algebraic percentages into quadratic equations based on quality variables of winning constants and changing factors, Zoey has more of a chance than Dj does.
Harold: (spits his tongue at Cameron)
Scott: (pointing at Cameron) Permission to throw him overboard?
Dawn: Permission NOT granted.
Scott: Ay Ay sir. (tosses Cameron overboard anyway. Dawn glares at Scott)
Cameron: Ouch! (gets a wedgie on the boat's anchor)
Tyler: Dj has got this game in the BAG! And after he's done shoving the game into the bag, he's gonna(Abigail cuts him off)
Abigail: Run with it like he stole it? (smiles. Tyler shrugs and nods)
Cody: Go! Dj! Go Zoey!
Sierra: Silly Codykins! (grabs Cody) You can only pick one side. (Cody begins gasping for air)
Courtney: You're all being ridiculous! Zoey is so gonna win. She has all of the motivation AND the ability to pull it off. She's bound to win. Victory is hers.
Duncan: I love it when you annoy everyone around you. (Duncan and Courtney make out)
Scott: Permission to toss THEM overboard?
Gwen: (stops and thinks for a second)…..granted. (Duncan punches Scott before he can take another step closer to them)
Jo: Win this, Zoey! Go Commando on his butt!
Izzy: Where's your bow and arrow!? AW MAN! Use that thing! That's partly why I'm rooting for you. WE'RE BOTH CRAZY! (laughs)
Mike: You can do this Zoey! (blushes when she smiles at him) You're gonna do great!
Dj and Zoey: (wave to their fans)
Noah: (is seasick and waves back at Dj and Zoey) I'm hating this as much as you guys are. (Abigail puts her arm around Noah)
Abigail: Nothing beats being sea sick like a hug!
Noah: I'm pretty sure everything beats being seasick. (throws up over the boat)
Lindsay: YAY! Go Dj Go! Win!…Is the final challenge for us to cheer!? (gasp) Who's winning?
Heather: Not your brain.
Chris: HELLO! (flies over everyone in a helicopter) Are you ready kids!?
Beth: Ay Ay Chris!
Chris: I can't hear you!
Leshawna: THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE IN A FREAKING HELICOPTER YOU JERK!
Chris: So here's how the finale is gonna play out. (a giant map unrolls from the helicopter and unfolds so everyone can see it) You see! Here's the deal, Dj and Zoey are going to swim to the cliff and climb it!
Dakota: OH! It like the first challenge. But reversed! Oh my gosh, Chris. You're so clever! In fact, so am I! We should both be hosts. (mumbles "make me famous or I'll kill you")
Chris: Nobody cares, Dakota. And yes, I AM clever. (smiles at the camera) They will climb the cliff ALL the way to the top! At the very top, they will find bobsleds. They will sled down the large hills!
Alejandro: (still in his body cast) HA! Revenge! How dangerous is this hill? Make them break their bones!
Chris: Calm your casts, Bandage Boy. The danger level of the mountain you sled down was about an 8.4. The mountain they'll be sliding down is a 3.9. (Dj and Zoey sigh)
Bridgette: That's good. At least they won't get hurt that bad.
Shin: Chris is about to mention the catch in three…..two…..one.
Chris: OH! But there's a catch! (Shin sighs) WITH the added booby traps we've placed on the slope of the cliff's hill..it's danger level is now a 6.8 out of ten! Much more dangerous! But not as bad as Alejandro's. Now, as they speed down the hill, they must gain speed. More and more speed. Can you guess why?
Brick: You didn't put a small ramp at the bottom of the hill…did you? Sir?
Chris: Of course not! We would NEVER put a small ramp on the bottom of that hill.
Chris: WE put a HUGE ramp at the bottom of the hill. (Shin sighs) Now, after flying off this super tricky ramp, you will go flying over the island! And by our exact mathematical predicaments done by our tech department. (points to tech department, they are literally toddlers) We have calculated that you WILL land on……MOUNT LOOMING TRAGEDY!
Anne Maria: Yo Chris man! What's up wit all the lame Mountains!
Chris: Oh, actually, we took leftover rocks made from all of the previous challenges debris! Our interns worked very hard overnight to build this. (points to a giant spire made of rocks)
Mike: And why exactly is it called, Mount Looming Tragedy?
Chris: Because it looms, and our intern's life support bills were tragic. Moving on. Once you land on the top of Mount Looming Tragedy, you two must face Chef! He will prevent you from getting a zipline that leads down into the forest.
Ezekiel: A zipline!? I love those things, eh!
Vanessa: Let me know when we should start caring.
Chris: At the bottom of the zipline, you will land in the forest. In the forest, you will find a flagpole with your flag on it! The flag was made by our arts and crafts department. (points to the toddlers again) Now, after the flagpole, you must take it to a gorge. This gorge is a little ways from the flagpole. Not that far. Over the gorge is a small, wooden, walkway for each of you. You must deliver eagle eggs from one side of the gorge…to the other.
Izzy: Eagle eggs!? Cool! Are we gonna feast on them as a victory meal!? Will the winner get to eat an EAGLE!?
Chris: Actually. It's a surprise. But the eagle eggs will make the challenge harder. (laughs. Shin sighs) And then its a long distance jog to the finish!
Eva: THIS BETTER BE ENTERTAINING!!
Chris: Oh it will….It will. Before we begin. Would our finalists care to tell us what you will do with the million dollars? (Zoey and Dj prepare to speak before Chris cuts them off) Nobody cares. (blares an air horn) NOW GO! (flies off)
DJ: Wait! Go right…now? (Zoey leaps into the water and starts swimming towards the cliff) WAIT! (puts on goggles) Now I'm ready! (leaps into the water and paddles like a dog towards the cliff)
Cody: That's not swimming Dj! That's floundering!
Dj: Cameron: Actually. That's cal(Scott drops the anchor and Cameron into the water)
Scott: Oops. Did I do that?
Beth: Yeah. You did as a matter of fact.
Zoey: (has started climbing the cliff) Allright! I'm on my way!
Dj: (whimpers) I'll be there soon.
Zoey: (is climbing fast) Soon as in "much later". See you at the finish line, Dj! (continues climbing)
Dj: Oh man Oh man Oh man! I gotta catch up!
Chris: (flies down to the eliminated campers) You guys can head to your stations now. (the yachts pull away)
=== The Cliff === (Zoey is more than halfway up. Dj just began climbing)
Dj: (grabs the cliff) Ouch! (pulls his hand away) Are these? nails!? (looks at the cliff, there are tons of nails hammered into the cliff)
Chris: Try not to get your hands impaled! (flies off)
Zoey: (is climbing still) I (pant) will win this no matter (pant) what the cost.
Beth: (is lowered to Zoey's level on a crane hook) Need a drink? (has a water bottle. Zoey nods and Beth squirts the water all over Zoey's face)
Zoey: (coughs up water) Thanks. A little overkill though. But thanks. (laughs) Oh Beth, this is so exciting! I wanna win so bad! (sighs) It's good to have friends in high places.
Beth: (looks at how high up they are) Amen to that, sister. (Zoey high fives Beth and almost loses her balance. Zoey grabs the cliff and hangs on) That was a close one. (Zoey accidentally knocked a few rocks downward)
Dj: (yells up to Zoey) I'm not giving up that easy! (sees rocks falling towards him) …But I might just give up yet(gets hit by the rocks and falls into the water again)
Zoey: Woops. (keeps climbing)
=== Bottom of Cliff === (Dj is sitting in the water)
Dj: Oh…what's the use? I'm gonna lose. (Katie is lowered down by a crane hook and comes face to face with Dj)
Katie: You're not giving up on us, are you? Please don't quit. (Dj gasps in surprise)
Dj: KATIE! It's been so long since I've seen you!
Katie: And it's gonna have to be a bit of a longer wait. I will not let you give up. Come on, try. For everyone. For your mama. For me.
Dj: I will NOT let Mama down. No way in a million years.
Katie: Speaking of a million. GO! (Dj nods and grabs the cliff again and starts climbing)
=== Top of the Cliff === (Zoey has reached the top of the cliff. Courtney is holding a towel while Duncan is adjusting the bobsled)
Courtney: ZOEY! Good. You're here first. As a C.I.T. I have all of the important knowledge you need in order to win this thing. You now have to bobsled down this hill. Now let's get this done fast. Listen. You have to control the sled by holding the sides. Keep your head down and avoid moving your hips. Watch out for dark spots in the ground. Also make sure to(Duncan cuts her off)
Duncan: Make sure to avoid listening to Courtney. Just do what you have to do. (Courtney gasps in shock)
Courtney: How rude! Duncan! I was talking!
Duncan: All the more reason to interrupt. (They glare at each other and then begin making out) We have a weird relationship.
Courtney: (kisses him again) Shut up and kiss me you fool! (they kiss again)
Zoey: (awkwardly walks around them) Okay then. I'm just gonna…go now. (sits on the bobsled and looks at the hill) AUGH! This is terrifying! (hears a voice in her head)
Beth's Voice: You have to believe, Zoey…you have to believe!
Zoey: Beth? Is that you? (Beth taps her head. Zoey looks up and Beth is directly above her, still on the crane hook) Oh. nevermind. Well, thanks for the support. (sleds down the hill)
=== Cliff === (Dj is climbing up, he's more than halfway there. Katie is talking him to the top)
Katie: So what ARE you gonna do if you win?
Dj: Help my family move back to Jamaica! I'll also take you to the nicest resort and we can have our official date together. I also wanna donate a lot of my money to the needy and helpless animals. Oh, and maybe one or two orphanages.
Katie: That's so sweet! I hope you win.
Dj: I hope I do to. (reaches the top) I'm here! I'M ON TOP OF THE WORLD!
Katie: Now you have to bobsled down.
Dj: ….. I'm gonna be on the BOTTOM of the world. (Abigail is cheering with pom poms while Noah is sitting and reading a book)
Abigail: (is running in circles while jumping in the air) Who is gonna win today! I know the answer is DJ! DJ! DJ! HOORAY FOR DJ! (does the splits)
Dj: Thanks Abigail! (runs to the bobsled and sits down on it) Noah…got anything for me?
Noah: Huh? (looks up from his book) Meh….. lean forward when on the bobsled. Trust me. (keeps reading)
Dj: Trust I will. (sleds down the hill) MMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!
=== The Bobsled Slope === (Zoey leaning backwards and going slowly as not to set off any traps. Dj is leaning forwards and is going so fast, that when he sets off traps, they go off after he passes them)
Zoey: (is scared out of her mind) BEAR TRAP! (goes around it) DEER TRAP! (goes around it) YETI TRAP! (goes around it) LOCH NESS MONSTER TRAP! (goes around a bear trap the size of an entire cabin)
Dj: (gets in a fetal positions and clings to his bobsled for dear life) AAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHH (bobsled is going at an intense and ridiculous speed) I think I just passed some trees! (goes faster) I think I just passed some animals. (goes faster) I THINK I JUST PASSED THE SOUND BARRIER!!!
Zoey: (looks down at the large ramp and sees Dakota and Ezekiel with blinking lights, directing Zoey and Dj to the ramp) I'm almost there! (hears screaming) Huh? (looks behind her and sees Dj speeds past her and flies off the ramp at lightning speed)
=== The Sky === (Dj is flying through the air and hurdling towards the tall rocky, mountain called Mount Looming Tragedy)
Dj: AAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHH (Chris shows up in a helicopter with Charlotte and Trent)
Trent: You can do it Dj! We're here to calm you down and make sure you keep your cool.
Dj: Okay. Thanks. (takes a deep breath)
Trent: Just don't look down. (Dj screams)
Charlotte: (nudges Trent) That's not a good thing to tell someone as their hurdling thousands of feet above the ground. (Dj hears this and screams again) What if he got scared?
Dj: Excuse me guys…but…..WHAT ON EARTH MAKES YOU THINK I'M NOT ALREADY SCARED!?!?!?
Trent: He makes a valid point.
Charlotte: (they awkwardly fly through the air in silence) Well…break a leg Dj.
Dj: Nothing you're saying is at all helpful! (falls towards Mount Looming Tragedy)
Trent: We need to work on our dialogue.
Charlotte: That's a must. (Chris flies them away in the helicopter)
=== The Bobsled Slope === (Zoey is speeding down the slope she waves to Ezekiel and Dakota as they use lights to make a runway for her before she flies off the ramp)
=== The Sky === (Zoey is flying through the air. Chris shows up in a helicopter again. Now sitting next to him, are Mike and Izzy)
Mike: Way to go, Zoey!
Zoey: Mike! It's so good to see you.
Izzy: Oh my gosh! This reminds me of the time where Zoey had to skydive and she was scared because Zoey has a fear of skydiving!
Zoey: (calmly) Thanks for the reminder….. (begins screaming)
Mike: Calm down Zoey! It's okay! Just listen to my voice! (gasps into Chester) Chester: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! (Chester and Zoey scream. Izzy cackles)
=== Mount Looming Tragedy === (Dj lands on the top of the thin, rocky, mountain. Dj looks up and standing above him, is Chef dressed as the psycho killer)
Chef: RRRRRAAAAAWWWWWRRRRR !!! (holds up his chainsaw)
Dj: I have a pair of boxers and I'm not afraid to soil them!
Chef: (swings the chainsaw at Dj. Dj runs towards the edge and looks past Chef. There are two wooden poles. And attached to them, are two zip lines)
Dj: The zip lines! (dodges Chef's hook)
Zoey: (falls from the sky and lands on Chef. Her collision has knocked the Chainsaw out of Chef's hand) I made it! Am I late?
Dj: Couldn't have picked a better time to fall from the sky.
Zoey: (picks up Chef's chainsaw and then looks at the zippiness. Then Zoey looks back at Dj) Sorry Dj. But I wanna win.
Dj: (back away) Zoey…..no…don't do it.
Zoey: (raises the chainsaw and…………… cuts one of the zip lines)
Dj: Oh…I totally thought you were gonna kill me. …I'm glad that didn't happen. That would have sucked.
Zoey: (grabs the only T-bar) Like I said, nothing personal, buddy. (uses the T-bar and slides down the zipline. The other zipline is cut and the only zip line that Zoey just took has no T-bar)
Dj: Oh no! (Chef wakes up and walks towards Dj and knocks Dj over the edge. Dj clings to the wooden poles and hangs on. Dj can grab the zip line from where he is)
Chef: You really don't know…do you? Don't you remember what happened to your appetite?
Dj: I know all about my appetite! It died!! Just like my father!
Chef: No Dj….I AM your father.
Dj: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO That's IMPOSSIBLE!……Wait? Are you being serious?
Chef: (laughs) NO. But that was some epic dialogue between the two of us, wasn't it? You were like…"MY APPETITE!" And I was like "I am your father" and you were like "nOOOOOOO!!!" (laughs and then calms down….)
Dj: Yeah. …..That..That was epic. (They both stand their in an extreme state of awkward silence………..…) I'm gonna go now. Okay. (grabs the bare zipline with his hands)
Chef: Sure. Sure. Good luck, dude.
Dj: (this is really awkward) Uh…okay…bye. (goes down the zip line and zips down with his bare hands since he has no T-Bar) AAAUUUGGGGHHHH ROPE BURN! (Dj gets serious rope burn on his hands from the zip line)
Chef: (Dj's is out of sight. Chef turns to the camera) ……I'm currently dating his mom. (awkward meter explodes)
=== The Forest === (Zoey has landed and rolls onto the ground perfectly. Zoey looks in the distance and sees the flagpole. The flags are waving in the air. One is green with a brown letter "D" on it. The other is red with a pink flower on it)
Zoey: Victory has never looked so pink! (runs towards her flagpole. Eva has Cameron on her shoulders. They run alongside Zoey)
Eva: GET MOVING! YOU'RE TOO SLOW!
Cameron: She's moving at approximately 17 miles per hour. If she maintains the same speed, and if Dj is at a speed of 19 miles per hour, He'll catch up at a time frame of about 2 minutes if both are constant.
Eva: (throws Cameron into the woods) Shut it dweeb! MOVE IT, FLOWER GIRL! (Zoey runs faster)
Zoey: (Anne Maria is blocking Zoey's path) Anne Maria. You're blocking my way.
Anne Maria: That's the point, red. Now I know you've had your gross, little, poorly conditioned eyes on my man, Vito. Plus, getting past me is part of the challenge, honey.
Zoey: Well, then. (cracks her head and cracks her knuckles) Eva. Time me. Let's see how fast I can get Anne Maria to move out of the way.
Cameron: (crawls out of the woods with a stopwatch and clicks it) GO! (Zoey runs forward and leaps in the air to kick Anne Maria. Anne Maria turns around and Zoey kicks her hair. It's like kicking a solid brick wall)
Zoey: AUGH! My leg! What is your hair MADE OF?
Anne Maria: (flicks her own hair. It makes a sound of knocking on steel) You ain't goin nowhere! (pulls out her hair spray and sprays Zoey. Zoey is blinded temporarily and gets headbutted by Anne Maria) Give up Zo!
Dj: (lands in the forest and screams at his hands) ROPE BURN! ROPE BURN! AUGH! I CAN'T EVEN MOVE MY FINGERS! (sees Anne Maria spraying Zoey) Ugh…is that allowed? (sees Zoey coughing and on the ground) Nobody uses fashion products as weapons unless DJETTE'S SAYS SO! (runs toward Zoey and Anne Maria)
Shin: (runs next to Dj with Bridgette) Don't run towards them, get the flag!
Bridgette: Zoey is in a lot of pain. Someone should help her.
Zoey: Dj. Help! (Dj runs towards Zoey to help her before Scott steps in between Dj and Zoey)
Scott: You should probably run, Dj. I'm here to stop you, and I don't think you want anymore injuries today. (punches his hands together and walks towards Dj)
Shin: Knock him out, Dj. You can do it!
Dj: I can't clench my hand! That's how bad this rope burn is.
Bridgette: Do something!
Scott: Prepare for a world of hurt, Dj. (cracks his knuckles and steps closer to Dj)
Dj: (stands his ground) If I can take an insane camp chef with emotional childhood trauma problems. I can most certainly handle you. (Bridgette and Shin smile and step back)
Scott: (smirks) You believe that?
Dj: (pause) Nope. But I'll pretend I do. (charges at Scott)
Scott: (steps aside and trips Dj. Dj and Zoey are now lying on the ground, next to each other. Dj tries getting up, but every time his hands touch the ground, he gets the rope burn pain on his hands)
Dj: I guess this is how it ends. Huh? It was nice competing against you, Zoey.
Zoey: It was nice competing against you as well.
Scott: Any last words?
Anne Maria: (whispers to Scott) We ain't actually ending them, are we?
Scott: (looks surprised) We're not?
Dj: I'll tell you my last words…….. kiss….my…GRASS! (swings his legs across the ground knocks Anne Maria and Scott's legs which cause them to fall onto the ground. Their faces hit the grass)
Zoey: (stands up and helps Dj stand up) Ready for a fair game?
Dj: Absolutely. (Dj steps on Anne Maria's spray tan can which explodes gas in Anne Maria and Scott's faces. This knocks them out. Dj and Zoey charge towards the flagpoles)
=== Flagpole === (Zoey and Dj reach the flagpoles. Sam and Geoff are greasing the flagpoles)
Sam: Sorry Dj. (has applied a heavy coat of grease onto Dj's flag pole)
Geoff: Sorry Zoey, dudette. (has also applied an immense amount of grease onto her flagpole)
Zoey: (begins climbing the flagpole. But she keeps slipping) Darn!
Dj: (grabs the flagpole but lets go when his hands hurt from the rope burn) Hmmm… (walks away from the flag pole)
Geoff: Dude! Where are you going? You're needed here! (Dj ignores him and keeps walking)
Zoey: (still trying to climb. She slides back down) Allright. No more Ms. Nice Guy. (grabs Geoff's hat and wipes the pole with it)
Geoff: My lucky hat! Give it ba(Zoey roars at Geoff) Nevermind. You can keep it. It's cool.
Dj: (runs back at a fast running speed and jumps in the air and kicks down his flagpole) Dj runs over and picks up the flag) Hey! My rope burn isn't so bad anymore! I can do this!
Zoey: (almost at her flag) So. (climbs up) can I.
Dj: That's my cue to leave. Bye Zoey! (runs away from the flagpoles with his flag)
=== The Gorge === (Dj runs up to the edge of the gorge and looks down. Below is a river full of hungry sharks)
Dj: So THAT'S where the sharks went. (looks over and sees a nest with eggs in them)
Chris: (in a helicopter. Flies above the gorge) HI Dj! I didn't expect you to get here first. Now you must take that eagle egg and walk it across this small walk way. (A board of wood acts as a small and incredibly thin bridge across the gorge)
Dj: (puts his flag in the nest and takes out the eagle egg) I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. (steps onto the plank and begins walking across it) I think I can I think I can!
Zoey: (approaches the gorge with her flag. She places it in her nest and grabs an egg) I know you can't I know you can't.
Dawn: (standing on the other side of the gorge with Cody. Their job is to help Zoey and Dj focus) Zoey! Don't look at us. Watch your feet. Don't worry about the sharks. Only look at the walkway. Step…be calm. Keep your balance. Deep breaths. (Zoey follows her instructions perfectly and is walking across with ease)
Cody: DJ! Do it for your friends! Do it for Katie! Do it for MAMA!
Dj: Mama? MAMA! (smiles) That's it! (Dj begins scuttling across the plank at a very fast speed)
Cody: How are you doing that so fast?
Dj: Spent my life avoiding the sidewalk cracks. Don't wanna break my mom's back, do I? (is almost at the other side before a shriek pierces the air) What was that? (almost loses balance)
Dawn: Oh no. The parents of those eggs! I sense them coming! And their auras are bright red! (two eagles swoop through the gorge and scare Zoey and Dj)
Dj: AUGH! Angry MAMA ANGRY PAPA!
Zoey: Get back! Get back you birds! (one eagle swoops near Zoey and misses when she ducks)
Dj: (is about to step onto the other side of the gorge) I did it(an eagle swoops and breaks Dj's walkway, Dj's foot loses it's platform and Dj falls downward)
Cody: DJ!? Noooo!
Dj: (grabs onto the side of the gorge and holds onto his egg) I'm okay! (Zoey is getting attacked by both of the eagles)
Zoey: AUGH! (falls into the gorge and Dj puts his eagle egg in his pants and catches Zoey) You saved me!
Dj: Now we're even. (starts climbing up the cliffside with Zoey on his back. They both reach the top and see Dawn sitting in the eagle's nest, petting the eagle parent's heads and whispering to them)
Dawn: (humming while meditating with the eagles. Dj and Zoey quietly place the eggs into the nest) Thank you both. These eagles appreciate that very much.
Dj: Don't mention it.
Zoey: No problem.
Cody: Hey dudes! I love you both. Dj, you're the man! Zoey, you're the coolest. But right now, one of you needs to become a millionaire! (Dj and Zoey look at each other and nod. They both begin running)
=== The Final Run === (Dj and Zoey are running side by side)
Dj: It's been a fun game.
Zoey: It's been a blast. And hell at the same time.
Dj: I'll miss Wawanakwa when this is all over.
Zoey: You will? I won't.
Dj: What are you going to do with the money, if you win?
Zoey: If I won, I would open up more theaters and help people realize that the old times can't die yet. I also plan on helping myself get into a good acting college so I can really get ahead in life.
Dj: I would help my family and also get some good work in for getting a college degree in catering and veterinary practices.
Zoey: Sounds cool. May the best win.
Dj: May the best win. (they run side by side)
=== The Finish Line === (All of the campers are gathered at the finish line. They are sitting around, bored)
Dakota: Ugh. Where ARE they? It's been like… 5 minutes!
Leshawna: They'll be here! Chill out, girl.
Harold: HERE THEY COME! (points to Dj and Zoey who are running as fast as they can)
Leshawna: Ooh! It looks close!
Jo: I think Zoey's ahead!
Owen: Dj looks ahead! I think he's going faster!
Justin: Obviously, Zoey is quicker. She's gonna win!
Brick: I'd put my money on Dj. He's almost here.
Sadie: So is Zoey!
Katie: GO DJ!
Mike: GO ZOEY!
Everyone: GO!/ COME ON!/ YOU'RE ALMOST DONE!/ WIN THIS ALREADY!/ YOU CAN DO IT/
Dj and Zoey: (leap into the air and dive for the finish line. Zoey leaps straight forward while Dj tucks his head in)
(Dj tucked his head in and curled into a ball. He rolls across the finish line. Zoey lands in front of the finish line, but not across it)
Chris: The Winner of Total Drama Island is DJ!!
Dj: I won? I WON!!! I can't believe it!!
Zoey: (smiles and shakes Dj's hand) Congratulations Dj. You deserve it.
Dj: Thanks Zoey. I'm really sorry. You were one of the better players.
Zoey: Are you apologizing? (laughs) I came here to meet new people and to become known to the world. I'd say I did more than that. Trust me, I'm perfectly fine with this.
Dj: (hugs Zoey) Thanks Zoey. (Dj gets pulled away by Katie and they come face to face) KATIE!
Katie: You did it! I knew you could! I just knew it! (they hug and close their eyes to kiss. Cody pops up in between them. Cody gets kissed by both of them)
Cody: I'd say Dj owes us a PARTY!
Dj: Aw! What the heck? Why not? It's a million dollars. I have enough money for one measly….huge, outrageously, awesome off the hook PARTY!
Geoff: YEAH! That's what I'm talkin about! PAR-TAY!
Anne Maria: YES! Please let it be on a yacht!
Lindsay: How about a flying yacht?
Dj: (gets picked up and carried away by his beloved fans) Thank you guys! Thank you!
Everyone: DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ!
Zoey: (sits alone. She gets tapped on the shoulder and looks behind her to see Sam, Mike, Leshawna, Gwen, Cody, Dawn, and Will) Oh. Hi guys.
Mike: You did awesome. I just thought you should know. I was proud of you.
Cody: Don't be sitting around here for too long. The celebration is at camp! (runs off)
Will: Zoey. You kicked butt. I mean, 44 out of 45. That's just sweet. Don't doubt yourself for a second.
Dawn: You grew in more ways than you can imagine. Looks at all of the friends you have.
Mike: Seriously, Zoey. You are one of the nicest people I've ever met.
Leshawna: Now what are we sittin around here for? Let's go to the celebration! This show can finally keel over and DIE! (they cheer and run to the campgrounds)
=== The Bonfire Pit === (All of the campers are gathered at the pit. Dj is standing next to Chris. Chris is at his barrel with a golden plater)
Chris: Campers. It's been a long eight weeks since we began. But from watching you guys, I've seen many things. I've seen you grow, live, and(Abigail cuts him off)
Abigail: Watch us change in our cabins?
Chris: No Abigail! I'm not a creeper!
Izzy: Are you sure?! (gasp) Chris is a total creeper! CHRIS THE CREEPER!! (laughs)
Chris: ZIP IT! Anyway, I would just like to say, it is my absolute honor, (holds up the golden platter and removes the lid to reveal a marshmallow) to award the final marshmallow of the season….to Dj.
Dj: (holds up his marshmallow) I'll treasure it forever. (Owen grabs it and eats it) Aw man! Now why'd you go and do that?
Owen: Wasn't me. (chews the marshmallow)
Chris: I would also like to reward Dj, the promise of the century. A check…FOR ONE MILLION DOLLARS! (Everyone cheers except for Alejandro)
Dj: Thank you! Thank you Chris! (hugs Chris)
Chris: Thanks too, Dj. Now let go.
Dj: But how can I toss you in the lake if I let go of you? (Everyone goes wide eyed and smiles. Except Chris)
Chris: Dj….no…no…no.NO,NO,NO! (Dj holds Chris above his head and walks him down the Down of Shame)
Duncan: DO IT! (laughs)
Dj: (the others join him at the dock as Chris gets thrown into the lake) That's for the everything, McLean. (laughs and high fives Geoff, Shin, and Lightning)
Lightning: SHA-BOOM! Baby!
Shin: This show is FINALLY over.
Bridgette: (grabs Shin's shoulder) What's the rush to leave so fast? (Shin becomes nervous)
Shin: It's not that I want to leave! I mean uh. I would never want to leave you Brid(Bridgette rolls her eyes and kisses Shin)
Courtney: Why can't we be as happy as them?
Duncan: For one thing, she's not Courtney.
Courtney: Take that back!
Duncan: Make me! (Courtney grabs his face and kisses him) Okay… I take it back. (they make out)
Noah: (taps Duncan on the shoulder) Hey. In case you guys are looking for more fun. Chef's hiding in the dining hall.
Duncan: (smirks and yells to everyone) Hey guys! Chef's in the dining hall! Let's throw him too! (Most of the campers storm into the dining hall)
Abigail: Noah! Since when do you help people with fun stuff?
Noah: Take a wild guess.
Abigail: (laughs) Well. This calls for making out.
Noah: That's not my forte. (Abigail tackles him to the ground and kisses him) …Okay. I can adapt.
Beth: (scoots next to Alejandro and sighs) Look at all of these lovebirds.. making out. Isn't it beautiful?
Alejandro: Don't even think about it.
Beth: Oh I'm thinking about it. And I'm gonna do it! (grabs Alejandro's face and makes out with him. Alejandro tries screaming for help)
Leshawna: (walks out of the dining hall with Jo. They are both holding up Chef) WOO! Dump em in the lake!
Jo: You know, Leshawna. You're not that bad.
Leshawna: Same. You all right, girl. (they smile as they toss Chef into the lake) That's how WE roll! (high fives Jo)
Jo: (turns around and walks right into Harold) Oh, hi pointy.
Harold: (holds up flowers) I was just gonna say, that, if you do or do not like me, that's okay, but if we could jus(Jo puts her hand on his mouth)
Jo: You talk too much. That's what I don't like about you.
Jo: It's what I love about you. (kisses Harold)
Harold: boo YAH!
=== Bonfire Pit === (The campers have all gathered around the bonfire. Roasting marshmallows)
Cody: I know a campfire song! (clears his throat) "Let's gather around the campfi(Most of them immediately shout "NO")
Will: (watches all of the couples making out and kissing) Love is beautiful, isn't it?
Heather: (scoffs) No.
Brick: (wipes tears from his eyes) Yes.
Vanessa: Oh please. If you ask me, they sho(Scott flicks a bit of his roasted marshmallow which lands in her hair. Vanessa stands up and freaks out. She runs to the washrooms)
Gwen: That was the first cool thing I've ever seen you do.
Scott: Oh put a sock in it.
Staci: Socks were actually invented by my great great great great great great great great great great grandm(Scott stuffs his entire marshmallow in Staci's mouth. The marshmallow is so gooey that it clamps her mouth shut)
Gwen: That's the second coolest thing I've ever seen you do. Keep it up. (Scott prepares to argue before Shin interrupts)
Shin: So, this is it. We're done.
Katie: Seems that way. (frowns and hugs Dj)
Dj: Katie, we're going on that awesome date I promised. I haven't forgotten any of that. And I'm certainly not forgetting any of you.
Leshawna: Except Blaineley. We'll all forget about her. (they all laugh and agree)
Felicity: I enjoyed bein here. It was lots of fun. Thanks for everything everybody.
Lindsay: Aw! I'll miss you all! Call me!
Zoey: I will too. (Zoey and Will fist bump)
Dj: Goodbye Total Drama. Hello Mystery Meatless life. (they all sigh)
Charlotte: I'm sure we'll all miss Chef and his food very much. I mean, from being here all this time, its something we must truly value, right?…..….. (they all burst into laughter)
Dakota: Chris isn't here. (gasps) THE SIGN OFF! (Chris yells from the lake. They all ignore him. Dakota turns to the camera) That's a million dollars for Dj! The rest of us return to a life back home where we will live on with our lives! Will we all stay in touch? Will we all remain friends? What other amazing stories does Total Drama have in store for you? Thank you for watching, this MOST amazing season of TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND!